single sassy girl's dating advice

dear men, here are some of my dating tips for you...

The First Date
1. NO MOVIES! seriously...i think movies are good for the third or fourth date, but a movie on the first date is such a bummer. for me, i don't want to spend the night at a movie only to go to dinner with someone i may not even like. for me, movies are a personal thing. i ended up at the movies with a guy wearing a sweatshirt in a hot theater. he was upset that i didn't want to lean on him (um...hello, it's too hot!), and then was really offended when i finally turned to him and said, "would you shut the hell up, everyone's trying to watch the movie). needless to say, there was no second date.

2. keep it casual. i say start with drinks so you have an out if you need it. meeting up for a beverage keeps it casual and then you can move onto the date if you're both feeling the chemistry.

3. a guy should always pay for the first date. no, i'm not a gold digger or a female with archaic views of relationships. it's about the gesture. your first date doesn't have to be expensive...go to an art walk, free movies in the park, etc. just make sure that you pay for anything you do on the first date. if you don't, chances are you won't see a second date

4. have a few suggestions in your back pocket. if you don't drink alcohol and she does, chances are she's going to suggest meeting for drinks at a bar only to feel like a lush when she's drinking at the bar. when the inevitable question comes of "where do you want to meet" offer three suggestions that would make you both comfortable. Coffee  house, bar, museum...what ever and where ever it may be, first dates are tough enough without the added pressure of meeting some place that makes you uncomfortable.

5. try not to kiss her on the first date. you may want to, she may want to, doesn't matter...don't do it. again, the first date is a lot of pressure, why add the pressure of a first kiss?

Moving Beyond the First Date
6. NEVER EVER bring up how turned on you were, how you just wanted to make out with her, how you wanted to jump her, or any other way you may eloquently put it. we already think all you're after is the hook up. bringing up anything physical just convinces us that we were right, that's all you're after, and then we start to wonder if we should even bother.

7. if you really like the girl, throw the 3-day rule out the window. trust me on this one. we spend so much time obsessing on "does he like me" that by the third day we've convinced ourselves he wasn't into us and have started moving on.

8. second date is a good time for dinner, but be creative too. bowling, mini-golf, etc. as long as there's a fair warning most things are game. just know that we're probably going to be upset if we wore a dress and heels only to discover that you planned to go bowling.


General Rule of thumb
9. chivalry is NEVER out dated or out of style. Even the most uber-feminist appreciates thoughtfulness. don't go over board with ordering for her, just be sweet and thoughtful. everyone wants to feel special

10. If a girl says she's busy, then she probably just has a busy week. Now, if a girl is dodging your calls, not replying to e-mails and text messages, not commiting to a second date, etc. then she's just not into you. Honestly, we're not much different than guys on that one

ok...that's it. those are my top 10 tips for guys out there. please know that there are exceptions to these tips and that your situation may be different, but i find them to be pretty accurate.

i hope they help or at least amuse. please feel free to chime in...i love reading your comments! thanks for reading and keep spreading the word!